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	<title>MIND READERS DICTIONARY &#187; diplomacy</title>
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	<description>For reading between the lines with greater comprehension</description>
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		<title>Within or about:  Three positions one can take in an argument.</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/within-or-about/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/within-or-about/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Dec 2008 01:01:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Can I change him?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Can I trust them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How can I communicate this to her?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle it with my friend?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle this conflict?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I negotiate this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Is there a win/win solution?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Is this worth fighting for?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I expect less from them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I expect more from them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What is my role here?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What should I do about this business problem?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What should I do?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What should we do about this family issue?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What to do about finances?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Which move helps my career?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[about]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bateson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[honesty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[meta]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Peirce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[upleveling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[within]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1560</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Last week I said I envied Obama&#8217;s patience in conflict, and this week as promised brings more about what it takes to display that sort of poise. This discussion also keys into two of the main themes that run through my thinking and writing. One is that the foundation of good behavior is built not [...]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Seven habits of sometimes effective critics: Unreliable sure-fire recipes for speaking your mind</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/seven-habits/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/seven-habits/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 Nov 2008 19:08:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How can I communicate this to her?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle this conflict?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criticism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feedback]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I negotiate this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[niceness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strategy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tolerance]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1204</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sure-fire recipes are wonderful things, and the history of civilization can be read as the search for and discovery of such recipes. Unfortunately, it can also be read as a long line of claims to have discovered allegedly sure-fire recipes that turn out to be not so sure-fire after all. Every day we experience the [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Tact Game: Is there always a winning way to give critical feedback?</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/the-tact-game/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/the-tact-game/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:58:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How can I communicate this to her?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle it with my friend?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle this conflict?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criticism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feedback]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I negotiate this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[niceness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strategy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tolerance]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1193</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s commonly held that critical feedback never has to hurt so long as you deliver it tactfully. Tact transcends all resistance. There&#8217;s a nice way to say anything. I live by that belief and promote it to my students. I tell them to assume that there&#8217;s nothing they can&#8217;t say to anyone as long as [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Exit interview: The pros and cons of giving feedback as a relationship ends</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/exit-interview/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/exit-interview/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:58:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How can I communicate this to her?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle it with my friend?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle this conflict?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I stay?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criticism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ending relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[exits]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feedback]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I negotiate this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[niceness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[quitting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strategy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tolerance]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1195</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I left a band recently. I had my reasons but wasn&#8217;t sure whether to share them on exit. I didn&#8217;t want to be dishonest. I can remember times when people gave me vacuous excuses for parting with me. Here I had invested heavily in a relationship and they were too stingy to let me in [...]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Teflon Tyranny: The hidden cost of self-defense</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/should-i-say-it/teflon-tyranny/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/should-i-say-it/teflon-tyranny/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 19 Sep 2008 01:27:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Should I get over it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I hold onto my dream or face reality?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feedback]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[megalomania]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[politeness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[psychopath]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[receptivity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Romance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-certainty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sociopath]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teflon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tyrany]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1072</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Studying politics and history, one character keeps popping up and making trouble. Here are his essential characteristics: 1. He believes he knows what everyone should do. 2. He believes it is his mission to get everyone to do it. 3. He is 100% confident in this belief and mission. 4. He is also 100% confident [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Lying: In politics as in everyday life, it&#8217;s not whether but when</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/should-i-say-it/lying/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/should-i-say-it/lying/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 19 Sep 2008 01:13:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Should I fight on?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I hold onto my dream or face reality?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[deception]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lying]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[niceness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/?p=1065</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Jeremy Sherman, Ph.D. You may have offended your friend; you&#8217;re not sure. You feel like apologizing. But if the insult didn&#8217;t even register, then you&#8217;ll open the very can of worms you&#8217;re trying to close. Still, if your friend is offended and fuming, you&#8217;d really better fix it. Should you say something? Another friend [...]]]></description>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Shop Talk: Compatibility in negotiating our incompatibilities.</title>
		<link>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/shop-talk/</link>
		<comments>http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/can-i-change-him/communication/shop-talk/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Jun 2006 17:19:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeremy Sherman</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Can I change him?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Can I trust them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How can I communicate this to her?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle it with my friend?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I handle this conflict?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Is this worth fighting for?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I be thinking about the bigger picture?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I expect less from them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I expect more from them?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I fight on?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I give in?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I just accept this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I say it?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Should I take what he said to heart?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What should I do about this business problem?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What's the spiritual thing to do?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Which move helps my career?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[agreeing to disagree]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[belief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Causality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[common ground]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[compatibility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Decision making]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[differences]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diplomacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[friendship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How should I negotiate this?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pragmatism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rhetoric]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.mindreadersdictionary.com/blog/?p=146</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I’d heard that a famous old religious scholar lived down the street, so when I saw him at a block party a few years back, just when I was getting into this philosophizing, I approached him and asked if we could have lunch sometime. See, I had designed a new religion. I called it “Taowinism” [...]]]></description>
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